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Dynamic Dealing Ducks

2023-03-13

Well, March 1st thoughts were all for nothing. While they were true at the time, GM VideoJ assessed his team for this year and the future amd decided if the right offer came along, he could make a move (or several). His scouting trip in New Zealand was approaching its end, and the trade deadline was coming up. It looked as though there were no reasonable trade partners in sight. GM Brrr was constantly flip flopping on his team’s direction (Les Quebecois sont incompétents). GM Boud was only trying to sell trash at prices akin to toilet paper during Covid (Encore, les francophones). GM RBK was his usual foolish self and GM LordStanley was his usual unresponsive self. GM VideoJ’s decision to stand pat at the trade deadline, was seeming like it would hold, until he was messaged by an old friend, GM CJO, also known as O’Deezy. He had the exact thing that the Anaheim Ducks needed, a forward for a Dman swap. A mutually beneficial trade was quickly thrown together. While the initial target of VideoJ was a different player, Dallas pitched Alex Debrincat and the Ducks were receptive. GM VideoJ did want the fans have wanted all year. He brought in a young dynamic scorer. While the Ducks had to lose top 4 defenseman Mackenzie Weegar, they knew he wouldn’t be around after his contract expires in 2025 anyway. GM VideoJ never liked the name Mackenzie either. Alomg with Weegar, Anaheim moved Vinnie Hinostroza, who just never meshed with the team, freeing up $2,000,000 in cap space. Something else was in the works.

With a new top 6 winger, the taste for trades was in VideoJ’s mouth. Moving out Weegar meant an increased role for Mikey Anderson and a need for a 6th defenseman. Later that night GM VideoJ got on the keyboard and struck a deal for Erik Gustafsson from Ottawa’s GM, Noddan. A true rental, Erik was brought in to provide some additional offense on the back end. The Ducks moved prospect Owen Lindmark in the deal. GM VideoJ has had nothing but nice things to say about Owen, and hopes for him to become a member of the Ottawa club in the future.

It seemed as though everything was in place, however, with captain Patrice Bergeron injured, and teams like the Oilers (Stupid GM Oily), Sharks (Already called incompetent), Kings (RBK hates him, so VideoJ likes him) and Canucks (Do they even have a GM) on their heels, Anaheim was still in the market for their prized possession- a top 6 centre. After long discussions with fellow Peterboroughian GM Pacman, and the promise to help VideoJ with all future home renovations, a deal was struck. The Anaheim Ducks acquired Max Domi! They shipped out a 1st round pick along with several players to make this work. Moving on from Sonny Milano was tough, however the Ducks would unlikely be able to afford him next year. Anders Bjork never seemed to hit his strive and was costing the Ducks money. Jordan Oesterle was also a victim of the cap crunch. Finally, Sean Walker would be coming back from injury next year and cost too much for Anaheim for a bottom pairing D. The deal was beneficial to both parties, as the Islanders acquired several low risk players and a high draft pick, while the Ducks received their star centre who will likely take over for Bergeron when he retires.

Anaheim had one more idea up their sleeve. With Brian Boyle retiring, he would be nothing but a cost to the team next year. GM VideoJ swapped him, along with a 5th round pick for the cheaper, contract expiring, Travis Boyd from GM Fieri. Similarily rated, the deal provides more money relief for the Ducks who need every penny they can get. The Deadline Ducks Quacked again, going all-in with every dollar. Quack!

PS. Yes, they also traded a 7th round pick for Matt Irwin who was then taken from that jerk GM Noddan on waivers, but we won’t talk about that. Actually, we will, GM VideoJ didn’t want Gm Blix’s stupid, smelly pick anyway!